Tag: funny

Salvation Army Bell Ringer Got High on PCP

Salvation Army Bell Ringer Got High on PCP

| December 20, 2018 | 0 Comments

I guess it was only a matter of time before a Salvation Army bell ringer heard “no” one too many times . . . and snapped. There’s a 40-year-old guy named David Kelley in Germantown, Maryland.  And last week, he was working as a Salvation Army bell ringer, collecting donations outside Walmart.   Well . […]

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A Guy Is Found Guilty of Rubbing His Coworker’s Sandwich on His Body While He Pleasured Himself

A Guy Is Found Guilty of Rubbing His Coworker’s Sandwich on His Body While He Pleasured Himself

| December 12, 2018 | 0 Comments

A guy in Pennsylvania was working at a department store a few years ago when he pleasured himself in the stock room . . . while he rubbed a coworker’s SANDWICH against his body. Then he put the sandwich back in the fridge. And he just got three to 12 months in prison for indecent […]

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The Cops Are Looking for a Guy Who Shoved a Footlong Into His…..

The Cops Are Looking for a Guy Who Shoved a Footlong Into His…..

| December 12, 2018 | 0 Comments

Oh man, if the cops are really looking for a guy with a footlong in his pants, then I’m definitely going to get dragged in for questioning. Heh. A guy went into a gas station in Lakeland, Florida a few weeks ago and grabbed a footlong sandwich off the shelf. Then . . . he […]

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SHE IS BIG MAD!!!

SHE IS BIG MAD!!!

| December 4, 2018 | 0 Comments

  This doesn’t seem like an overreaction or anything. A woman went into a deli in Philadelphia a few weeks ago and said she wanted to buy beer . . . but she didn’t have any money.  And the owner said no, you can’t have free beer. Which apparently made her so angry that she […]

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What Are Friends For???

What Are Friends For???

| September 25, 2018 | 0 Comments

I guess older Americans DO care about new music. A little too much in this case . . . Last Friday, a 71-year-old guy in Greenwood, Indiana named Roger Washburn was hanging out with a friend he’s known for over 50 years. So they go way back. And they started arguing over whether a song […]

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A Woman Shoplifts a Bible to “Be More Christian”

A Woman Shoplifts a Bible to “Be More Christian”

| September 25, 2018 | 0 Comments

The cops in Peoria, Illinois got a call from Walmart last Thursday about a 30-year-old woman who was busted shoplifting a BIBLE. When the cops got there, she told them WHY she’d stolen the Bible. The police report says she claimed, quote, “She was trying to be more Christian.”   She also shoplifted a shirt, […]

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A Made with the “Essence of Hot Underwear Models” Now Exists

A Made with the “Essence of Hot Underwear Models” Now Exists

| August 5, 2018 | 0 Comments

This  might not constitute a “Dummy of the Day”, but we do think it is somewhat foolish. We’ll let you guys be the judge. As there’s more and more craft beer out there and brewers need to come up with creative ingredients and gimmicks to stand out . . . well, that’s when THIS happens. […]

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Two People on Drugs Thought They Were Being Tracked by Aliens . . .

Two People on Drugs Thought They Were Being Tracked by Aliens . . .

| July 5, 2018 | 0 Comments

A couple in central Pennsylvania did a bunch of BATH SALTS last Friday, and convinced themselves they were about to be abducted by ALIENS. They saw tiny lights blinking in the sky and thought they were alien laser beams that were somehow tracking them.  So the guy pulled out a GUN and fired it into […]

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A Guy Is Accidentally Released From Jail . . . and His Wife Makes Him Go Back

A Guy Is Accidentally Released From Jail . . . and His Wife Makes Him Go Back

| June 26, 2018 | 0 Comments

There’s a woman in Colorado who’s either VERY law-abiding . . . or really, really likes having the house to herself. A 38-year-old guy named James Rynerson was in jail in Grand Junction, Colorado last month waiting for his trial for menacing, disorderly conduct, and trespassing. But the sheriff’s deputies got him confused with another […]

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A DUI Suspect Tries to Claim His Dog Was the One Driving

A DUI Suspect Tries to Claim His Dog Was the One Driving

| June 26, 2018 | 0 Comments

A 56-year-old guy named Scott Garrett recently got pulled over near Port St. Lucie, Florida after cops saw him swerving all over the road. They smelled alcohol on his breath. And he was also slurring his words . . . had bloodshot eyes . . . couldn’t walk straight . . . and there was […]

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